


I'm Sorry I Lied

by thegreatficmaster



Series: Supernatural Collection [33]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death, M/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-30 03:06:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19844287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatficmaster/pseuds/thegreatficmaster
Summary: Y/n needs to tell Dean one last thing before he goes.





	I'm Sorry I Lied

Y/n called Dean for the third time, hoping he would finally answer.

 _“Y/n. Why are you calling? You nearly done? We need some food right now”_ , Dean said, hoping y/n return to the bunker. 

Y/n choked on his blood slightly. 

He had been driving into town. 

On the way his tyre popped. 

He thought nothing of it and got out to examine the damage, only to be knocked out. 

Waking up, he looked around, finding himself to be tied to a chair. 

A demon stood in front of him.

They had been hunting this demon for a while now. 

Y/n struggled against the ropes as the demon droned on about killing him.

After a few minutes, he managed to free himself and charged towards the demon. 

He put up one hell of a fight, killing it, but not before he was stabbed in the abdomen. It was a deep cut, losing a lot of blood every second. 

As he dragged himself out of the building, he realized he was just a little way from the bunker. 

But he knew he wasn’t going to make it.

 _“Yea, Dean. I’m fine”_ , he lied, his voice weak and strained from the pain.

_“Ok. Well, how long you gonna be? I need a beer. This research is making my brain hurt”._

Y/n chuckled. 

Dean was so silly sometimes. 

He was like a grown child, despite being one of the strongest and bravest people y/n knew.

_“I’ll-I’ll be there soon, Dean. I just wanted-I-I wanted to tell you something”._

_“Shoot”._

_“I love you, Dean”_ , he admitted. 

He had feelings for Dean from the start, but never thought about admitting them. 

Dean was a ladies man. 

He always had been. 

Y/n knew there was no chance his feelings would be reciprocated, but Dean needed to know this. 

He needed Dean to know how he felt.

 _“Ookkaaay. Well, you’re family, y/n. So… you know”_ , Dean replied. 

He had trouble telling people he loved them. 

He usually let them know through his actions, or a few select phrases which meant the same thing to him.

Y/n knew this was Dean’s way of saying he loved him back. 

If only it wasn’t as family.

_“No, Dean. I mean, I love you. I’m in lo-”_

Y/n had a coughing fit, spitting out blood, his lungs screaming with each breath he took. 

_“Hey, man. You ok?”_

Dean was worried. That didn’t sound like a normal cough.

_“Yea. I’m fine. Anyway, I just-I wanted to say I’m in love with you, Dean. I have been since I met you. I-I love everything about you, and I just thought you should know”._

Y/n waited, wanting to hear a response as his vision got slightly blurry. 

Even if it was a rejection, he needed to know Dean had heard him and knew how he felt, before he left the world.

 _“I-I’m sorry, y/n. But I don’t feel the same. I think of you as family. Nothing-nothing more than that”_ , Dean replied, his voice soft and wavering.

Y/n teared up at this. 

He expected this type of answer. But it still felt like a thousand knives were piercing his heart right now, the rejection paining him more than the wound that was leaking blood like a faucet.

_“I know, Dean. I just thought it was time you knew”._

The dark spots were invading his vision now. 

He knew he was about to go. Any second now.

 _“I need to go, Dean. I love you all”,_ he rushed out and he hung up.

Dean was wondering what the hell was going on. 

The love confession and the way he hung up. 

But he pushed it to the back of his mind, trying not to think about the feelings that were stirring in him. 

The feelings he wished he could reveal to y/n, but he couldn’t. 

It was too dangerous. 

So Dean would deny them, even if it hurt more than anything to keep his love for y/n hidden.

“Hey, Dean. You heard from y/n yet. It’s been almost two hours since he left. He usually gets everything done faster than the both of us”, he stated, wondering what was taking y/n so long. 

“Yea. He spoke to me a while ago. He said he’ll be back soon”, Dean replied, his attention going back to his laptop.

Another hour passed, Sam getting worried sick now. 

It wasn’t like y/n to be taking this long. 

He was usually done in an hour or so. 

It had been over three hours now, and no call. 

He wasn’t replying to any texts either. 

Sam would have tried tracking his phone, but y/n had gotten rid of the tracker a long time ago, feeling as though it would invade his privacy.

“Dean, I think something’s happened”, he said, barging into Dean’s room. 

Both brothers realized y/n wouldn’t take this long, so went out, searching for y/n as best they could while still calling his phone.

After driving around town for half an hour and not finding any clue, the boys decided they needed some help from Cas.

“Cas! Get down here! Now!” Dean shouted, worry bubbling up inside him.

The angel appeared immediately and left after being told to look for y/n. 

Luckily, he hadn’t gotten sigils carved into his bones like the brothers had. 

He thought it was better this way. He wasn’t a major target for the angels, and Cas would be able to find him easily.

The brothers made their way back to the bunker, while Cas found himself in an abandoned shack. 

He looked around, before spotting a trail of crimson red leading out of the door. 

He followed it, the sight of his friend’s lifeless body sickening him.

He could sense his soul was no longer present. 

Nevertheless, he bent down and placed two fingers on y/n’s head, pushing all of his grace into his body in an attempt to heal him. 

But it didn’t work. 

Of course it wouldn’t. 

Y/n’s soul had already entered heaven by now. 

He picked up his friend and flew back to the bunker, laying y/n down on his bed, while he waited for the brothers to arrive.

“You think Cas found him?” Dean asked as he entered the bunker, hoping y/n would be fine.

“I hope so. I don’t get where he went to”, Sam added, praying his fears wouldn’t come true. 

Cas appeared in the library at that second, his face filled with sadness and despair. 

“Dean. Sam. I-you need to come with me”, he said, trying to keep his voice steady.

The brothers looked at each other, worried and scared now at the angel’s tone. 

They followed Cas, realizing he was leading them to y/n’s room. 

They hoped he was ok.

The angel turned to the brothers as they stood outside y/n’s room, pushing the door open, allowing the brothers to see y/n’s body, covered in blood, now limp and lifeless.

Sam rushed to his side, while Dean stood in the doorway, paralyzed with pain and anger. 

He should have realized something happened to him. 

The way he said his goodbye. 

The heavy breathing and wheezing. 

Dean should have protected him. 

His heart broke, the one person he wanted by his side forever, was now gone.

Sam cried for a while, a few tears escaping the angel’s eyes as well, while Dean made himself hold it together. 

Sam and Cas left to get a hunter’s burial ready, while Dean stood completely still, not moving a single inch, until the two others left.

He stared at y/n for a few minutes, before finally doing something. 

He made his way to the bed and lay down, pulling y/n’s body towards him and holding him tight, never wanting to let go. 

Placing a kiss in his hair, Dean finally let everything he was feeling out.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry”, he sobbed out, tears rolling down his face.

“I should’ve known something was wrong”.

He ran a hand up and down y/n’s arm, wishing he could sooth y/n, even though he was already gone.

“I should’ve found you, baby. I was supposed to protect you”. 

Dean had to stop talking, the lump in his throat too big, barely able to breathe.

He sucked in air, trying to stop the sobs coming, but that wouldn’t happen. 

He had lost y/n. 

There was no healing from this. 

No getting past it.

Dean had lost many people in his life. But after Sammy’s death, this was the worst pain he had ever felt.

“I’m sorry I lied. I do love you. I love you so much”, he cried as he pulled y/n impossibly closer, his hair getting wet from Dean’s tears.

“You’re my everything. Pl-please don’t leave me. Give me a chance. Come back to me. I’m begging you. I need-I need you so much”.

Dean let out an anguished scream, the pain being completely unbearable for him.

“Don’t go. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I need you. Come back”. 

He repeated this over and over, hoping and praying that y/n would somehow come back to him.

“Dean, we’ve got everything ready” Sam said, his voice quiet and pained when he entered the room again.

Dean looked up. 

The moment he had been dreading had arrived. 

Getting off the bed, he picked up y/n in his arms and carried him out the bunker and into the surrounding forest. 

Covering him in a white sheet, Dean lay him within the wooden pyre. 

Sam lit the match and threw it onto y/n, his body going up in flames.

Dean watched as his dreams and love went up in flames. 

If only he hadn’t lied. 

Dean could only pray that he’d be reunited with y/n once it was his time to go, and they could have their chance. 

This was one of the few prayers that came true. 


End file.
